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Together


by

8piscean8

 Genre: Indie Rock
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Description
This is my first recording with Logic Express 7. It is also my first full band recording (I did everything on it). Another first is recording live acoustic drums. My vocals still suck so I might be looking do some collaborations (form a virtual band) in the future. If anyone is interested (mainly vocalists male or female) please contact me. Any constructive feedback would be great. Thanks for taking the time to listen.
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Lyrics
When I see your face I see your smile
Your smile talks to me for hours

When we're alone and we're together
Alone in bed we're together

I've seen your face a million times
It never ceases to blow my mind
Your smile so warm it melts it flows through time
When I'm with you the stars align

Together we will fool them all
Leaving life from our port of call
We'll be running through the plains
This thing called life pulsing through our veins

Smiles grace our supple faces
While the rest of the world is running races

Leave at the door your tired soul
We'll get refreshed at the water hole because

When I feel your face I feel your fire
Your fire kindles me for hours

When we're alone and we're together
Alone in bed we're together
Song Stats
Hits: 4885
Comments: 61
Fans: 19
Plays: 316
Downloads: 174

Uploaded: Apr 05, 2007 - 11:26:14 AM
Last Updated: Apr 05, 2007 - 11:26:14 AM Last Played: Sep 05, 2014 - 02:09:53 AM
Song License
Creative Commons License:
Attribution-NoDerivs-NonCommercial

Creative Commons

Song Actions
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Hardware:
PreSonus Firepod, Power Mac G4, Fender Squire guitar, Fender Prophecy I bass, Line 6 Pod XT Live, AKG perception 200 mic (vocal), various mics for the drums, M-Audio Keystation 61es for the very few ambient sounds.
Software:
Logic Express 7
Comments
FEEL said 3850 days ago (April 5th, 2007)
I think
Your voice has potential... It has a much better texture than mine and I wish I had that tone personally. I always feel that my voice is my downfall. But this isn't the case for you in my opinion. I think if you practiced at it more the better you will get... The song has a cool progression but seems a bit empty in space... maybe tweak the mix... Try to bus out some of your instruments and use the buss setting to put everything in it's place, make the whole mix a little more full... don't mean to be critical and I like the song. Nice job for a first try at LE. It's a lot harder to use real instruments than to use the fake ones. Thanks for sharing.

John
Check out my latest song called Ten Years Gone Led Zeppelin Cover
8piscean8 said 3850 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi John,



Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment on my song. Your vote of confidence in my vocals is encouraging. I never practice signing until it's time to record (huge mistake). I guess the voice is the most complex instrument of all. I should spend some time working on it like I do my other instruments.



In your comment you talk about bussing some of the instruments and using the buss setting to put everything in its place. Could you elaborate on that some more? I don't think I put a buss or a send on any of the instruments. I am curious as to what magic can be worked with busses and sends.



Thanks again!




---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
Peter Greenstone said 3850 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
Potential
This song has a LOT of potential. I like the progression and the way it creeps in. I actually think you have a really good voice. It does sound like you could get a more expressive performance out of just practicing it for a while and finding some little nuances to put in the delivery. I like the general tone you are going for in the singing style; I'm just talking about finding those little things in how you sing certain lines that usually just takes letting the song grow on you more and become a little more familiar so you can play around more comfortably. Some interesting possibilties for harmony, too, beyond the existing harmony which is pretty good.

I like how you spaced the drums out stereophonically to wrap around. I assume it's due to the acoustics of the space the drums were played in that is giving it the romminess, but in case it's a small room reverb that you added in Logic that you can change to either a more spacious or more deadened dry, I'd recommend that. But if the drums are going to stay that way acoustically then I think the guitar and bass need to occupy a similar room acoustic space, maybe not all the way, but similar to feel more like the same space. Another thing that might sound really great on the guitar would be to do a track doubling on it, panning far left and right and offsetting one a nanosecond for a stereo effect.

I agree with Tex that it could also be filled out more eventually. So many possibilities. Great starting point conceptually.

Overall, I think it sounds quite rough in the recording and mixing and in some parts of the performances, BUT it all has a lot of potential. It's a good song and it sounds to me like you have the skills to eventually pull it together into a good production. It'll take quite a bit of work and lots of attention to little details but it's very doable. Aim high but take your time with it.
Check out my latest song called Iridium Flare (2013 Re-Release)
8piscean8 said 3849 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Peter,


Thank you for taking the time to listen and comment on my song. It is really great to hear your feedback on it.

Yes, you are correct that my drum sound is from my acoustic space (spare bedroom) and isn't a small room reverb. I didn't add any reverb to the bass or the guitars though. I remember reading somewhere that reverb when applied can kind of glue the instruments together and fill in the gaps.


I did copy my one guitar track and pan it -38 and +38. The timing was exactly the same. I'll try messing with the pan positions and moving one track a nanosecond.


When you say that it sounds rough in the recording/mixing stages could you elaborate on that a little more? I know I have some timing issues with everyting lining up. This was my first time recording to a click track which I found very difficult to do. This was also my first time trying to mix a song (doing more than just level balancing). I find EQ'ing is going to be an art in and of itself to master.


I did just finish writing the melody to the lyrics in the last day or so I was a little timid signing it.


Once again a big thank you for your wonderful comments and suggestions. I will use them along with everyone elses to improve upon.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
Peter Greenstone said 3849 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
yeah
Yeah, if you double a track and pan the two apart but do nothing else you will get no effect at all. It will just sound centered and louder. Try the offset.


As far as details on the roughness, really just in the ways I was talking about in the mix along with the timing issues you mention. Lots of little things, those details that would either be edited out or worked out in a new performance of things after the song is blocked out and you want to polish it up. Also, the ending just cuts off. Things like that.

Stick with it. I think it's a cool tune that'll really shine when you fill it out a little more and get the details and nuances refined (keeping the rock in there though).

---
www.petergreenstone.com
Check out my latest song called Iridium Flare (2013 Re-Release)
8piscean8 said 3848 days ago (April 7th, 2007)
Thanks again
Hi Peter,


Thanks again. I'll work on refining and tweaking with everyones suggestions.



---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
chikoppi said 3849 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
Great Work!
Let me start by noting how impressed I am with your recording skills. Not only are your tracks clean and rich, but your mix of timbre and EQ is really choice. I really feel like I can reach out and touch these instruments - and that effect adds significantly to the character of the song.

The opening is classic. The sparse style of the solo (together with whatever mode you are using) creates a great texture. My one complaint here regards the transition into the first verse. There is an increase in volume from the guitar that sticks out a bit much. Rather than raise the guitar levels you might start them at full range and raise the bass levels in the inro to match. You could then lower the bass levels approaching the first verse rather than raising the guitar.

I think the composition and melody are strong and I like your vocal delivery. The harmonies are very Neil Young (maybe a bit off, but I think it only adds charm)! I agree with other comments here regarding expression. You seem to be concentrating on the notes rather than the words. Approach the lyrics like an actor. Not to suggest you should ham it up, but rather that you should deliver the lyrics with real intent. The difference is subtle in practice, but dramatic in impact.

I like the arrangement of the instruments within the song structure. Very solid bit of song writing here!

There are a few timing foibles in the performance. Not severe, but probably most noticeable in the muted rhythms from the guitar. You can set up Logic to record multiple passes of the same section without pausing. Doing this allows you to record several takes of a phrase or section and then choose the best version. This approach is helpful because it allows you to settle into a groove as you play through the repeated section.

In all a great job of song writing and a display of some very sound studio skills. I realize it would be a lot of work, but I'd kind of like to hear another session of the exact same song. Now that you have the technical aspects down you could really concentrate on capturing nuance in the performance.
Check out my latest song called Disquiet (demo 2)
8piscean8 said 3849 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Brian,


Thanks for stoping by and listneing/commenting.


I really like your input on the transition going into the first verse. I think I will try your approach.


I am having some timing issues. I'm a newbie when it comes to playing along with a click track so I will practice playing and recording with one.


I tried doing the whole multiple pass thing in Logic but didn't quite understand it all. It would record over (but keep my original) on the same track and then add other tracks above it. I guess I was having problems keeping track of everything. That's more of a workflow issue I suppose.


I will definitely do another version in the future, but not right away. I am pretty burnt out on this song at the moment and have some other song ideas I would like to work on. Thanks again for the great feedback and suggestions.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
said 3849 days ago (April 6th, 2007)
Thx : )
This is an interesting song! First I listened with the big speakers, then I put on my headphones & that made a Big difference!!! All nuances/colors came through MUCH better : ) I'm on technician but if You work on it more & get some collabs on this it'll be very interesting I'm sure !

Thx again Happy Easter : ) Don't miss the Easterbunny in the EASTERFORUM I haven't laughed that much for I donno..lol...well I've been doin alot of laughing lately because of this great place !
8piscean8 said 3848 days ago (April 7th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Zoi,


Thanks for stopping by and taking a listen. There is quite a difference when going from big speakers to headphones. I personally like to listen to music on headphones. You do get to hear all the different nuances and all the panning that the artist/engineer/producer put in there. I am working on learning how to mix better. In reality though the majority of people hear music in mono. For example, if you go to a club the speakers are normally set to mono. Also if you are listening to music in your home on the big speakers, and you walk into another room in the house, you will be hearing a mono mix of your two stereo speakers.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
saymme said 3516 days ago (March 4th, 2008)
( 8
I like headphones 2 . Soon Easter again....!
apb said 3848 days ago (April 7th, 2007)
potential for sure ..
.. not much to add that hasn't been said already.
I liked the Velvet Underground-esque intro but a bit long IMO. Overall got this nice Presidents of the USA feel to it, even a touch in the vocals .. which I think are fine, just like them pushed
a bit and some higher harmonies here & there in the
verses. Your harmonies give a little Nirvana touch to
this, which is cool. Go for it!

Having tried recording drums once ..
I recognised that natural room ambience, more noticeable on headphones than with speakers - this is a nice effect for the drums for a song but I suspect you want to get them 'dryer' so you can do what you want to them post-recording.

Mix overall is good - just that rising guitar goes up
a bit too high too fast and you can hear the struggle to keep restricted to the click a bit.

Good lyrics as well.

Fresh, interesting song. Thanks for sharing.
Check out my latest song called Stowaway
8piscean8 said 3848 days ago (April 7th, 2007)
Thanks
Hello APB,


Thanks for the listen and comment. I am not at all familiar with the Velvet Underground. I'll have to check them out. For more drum control it would be nice to have a more dry sound. I guess I would have to buy some of that studio foam to get that happening. I do all my tracking and mixing in the same room so it is kind of a pain. I don't think I have heard your work (I could be mistaken) so I will have to check out your stuff. Thanks again for stopping by.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
apb said 3848 days ago (April 7th, 2007)
...
no problem, thanks for becoming a fan (wondered which tune
you liked though ;o)) .. just a thought/guess - I'm no
drum recording expert by any stretch of the imagination ..
but how are recording the cymbals? Overhanging mic? You
might find most of the 'ambient roomyness' is coming from
that source picking up the other drums when your not hitting cymbals (and thus adding that "sounding more distant" thang)-
just a guess, might be completely wrong. Not sure of the standard prodedure to lessen that effect if I'm right.. without having to go all foaming at the mouth ;o)
Check out my latest song called Stowaway
8piscean8 said 3847 days ago (April 8th, 2007)
I like
So far my favorite song of yours is "Say you don't love me". I really like your compositions and guitar playing. I am recording my cymbals and overall kit with two overhead mics. There are individual mics on the snare, kick, and toms. I think I might try to deaden the room somehow. I'm not sure of the standard procedure to lessen the effect either.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
bud said 3847 days ago (April 8th, 2007)
Really impressive first up on the Logic live
- like the build in the beginning and the whole structure is well developed. There's a certain tentativeness to the feel - it may come from the drumming. I feel like there needs to be more energy to the beat - not faster - maybe just more insistent. This is a small crit on a really good tune. I think you've got a fine voice with good character. You might want to try pushing yourself a little harder though. I find that sometimes I have to stand up and run in place or dance to get emotion and energy into my vocals. Have no fear - go for it!
Check out my latest song called Interdependence
8piscean8 said 3847 days ago (April 8th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Bud,


Thanks for stopping by and commenting. I really dig your tune "Take a minute". I need to work on my vocal delivery. I am quite shy behind the mic. Thanks for your encouraging comments.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
racerat said 3847 days ago (April 8th, 2007)
8
Hey,
Thanks for dropping me a line and suggesting I take a listen to this. First of all, don't dis your voice. You have a lot of potential in it. I think you need to project (sing a little less tentitively) a little more. The fact that this particular song has a slightly dragging/slower BPM, makes it seem like more of a stretch than it might if the cut had a little more bounce. I have the same issue, so I know. Picking up the pace helps to even out the instability.

The production is really quite good. I like how you kept most of the instruments fairly dry. The drums do sound like they are in quite a small space and could do with a little more verb to open them up a bit. The bass drum needs a bit of a volume/EQ boost, the bass guitar swallows/owns too much of the bottom end in the song. But the tone of both guitars is great, crunch and full. I might suggest, when you master the song, add a slight reverb (the same setting) to the entire song. It may unify the overall impression of space.

As far as the guitar, I would agree with the others here that with only one guitar it would be a good idea to dup the track and offset it a few ticks in time to create a double tracking effect hard panning it left and right. Another quick and very easy way to do this is to use a Sample Delay Insert on the guitar track in Logic. (I think Express come with this plug-in...I'm not sure) You can find it under the inserts "Mono-->Stereo/ Logic/ Delay/ Sample Delay" Then set the top slider (Delay L) to 1040 or so and Voila! instant double tracking! No fuss no muss. This works great with vocals too. It fattens then up quick. If you want to hear an example of what this sounds like listen to my latest song "Action Man" the guitar is single tracked (except for the lead) but it sounds super wide and fat. I used this trick on it.

Hope I wasn't too critical, and that some of what I said you can use. Great stuff. I look forward to hearing more. Keep me posted.

Philip

Check out my latest song called Paper Thin
8piscean8 said 3846 days ago (April 9th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Philip,

Thanks for stopping by. I might try raising the BPM slightly for my next recording of this song. I agree completely that the bass guitar owns too much of the bottom end and that the kick needs to be louder. I noticied in the trial version of iZotope's Ozone 3 that there was a section in there for applying reverb to the entire song. I haven't been able to play with it too much yet but like what I hear. I'll have to try your stereo delay trick. Thanks for sharing your production techniques. Don't worry about being too critical. I believe the only way we can grow as artists is through honest feedback for our songs. Thanks again!

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
echoroom said 3833 days ago (April 22nd, 2007)
Real live sound
This has a great live sound, Adam, really up front. there have abeen a lot of comments about the EQ and mixing so i won't repeat them. The intro to this is great, the verses fine - to me, it sounds like the chorus should kick in a bit more, but the bridge part following it works really well. However, i think the structure needs to redfined a bit - the parts are good, but for me, it needs to a bit more 'obvious'.

Hope this helps .... this has great potential

Steve
Check out my latest song called Heaven is Waiting
8piscean8 said 3833 days ago (April 22nd, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Steve,

Thanks for listening and commenting. I know what you mean about how the structure should be more defined. I wanted to try a different approach to the whole verse - chorus - verse - chorus - bridge -chorus structure. I guess I ended up with an intro - chorus - verse - bridge - chorus. I guess that is kind of messed up. Thanks for your valuable input.

---
Check out my new song <a style="color: orange" href="http://www.macjams.com/song/30599">Together</a> and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
jiguma said 3830 days ago (April 26th, 2007)
Brave man Adam!
Doing live drums I mean. I'm in agreement with John, Peter and Philip about your voice - what will make it better is lots of recording, and just singing along with the radio. I'm really impressed with the quality of the sounds you are getting (even the drums). Your setup must work very well (Logic of course helps enormously here, but really, your sounds are very well recorded).

I agree that this has considerable potential - it's really worth taking some time with and sorting some small things out, using some of the excellent suggestions already made.

Maybe, rather than playing to a click track (which I find very difficult to do) you could use a simple drum loop just to get the first instruments right. It doesn't have to stay in the mix, but I think you'll find it really helpful when laying down the first few instruments (guitar,bass perhaps).

I'm looking forward to hearing where you take this one.
Neil
Check out my latest song called We End Up Being All The Same (42)
8piscean8 said 3829 days ago (April 26th, 2007)
Hello
Hi Neil,

Thanks for stopping by and commenting.
For my new song that I am working on I am playing along with a drum loop instead of the click. That is working out a little better. My new problem is some latency issues that I am trying to work through (with).
When I re-record this song I will probably cut the intro a little bit shorter, change up the bass line, make the drums more varied (I was timid on the click with this one), and change up the melody to add more interest.
Thanks for your encouragement. I will keep you posted if I repost this song.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
alfalpha said 3824 days ago (May 1st, 2007)
what a terrific song!
I'm seriously impressed!
As far as your first recording on Logc is concerned, you've done so well! (I can't even get past first base in Logic-I lack patience, so kudos to you sir!)
This song brings me back to early Pixies, so, automatically, I'm a fan!

I'll also agree with Neil, Peter, Texasfeel et al, there's so much more potential r.e. the mix of this song, but, heck dude, you've already mastered the song writing aspect & 'entry level' of Logic...

My hat goes off to you sir...

btw, your vocals are, in fact, really good...don't change 'em!

Cheers & Thank You!
Alf...

Check out my latest song called Mania- w/DavisAmerica-The 'Sprout' Remix
8piscean8 said 3823 days ago (May 2nd, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Alf,


Thanks for stopping by and commenting. I'm not very familiar with The Pixies so I will have to check them out. I have a more polished version of this song on my Myspace page located Here. If you or anyone else get a chance, check it out.
I incorporated some of the comments/feedback I have received from the others above. I didn't want to post my song twice. Maybe when I totally rerecord it I will.
Once again, thanks for your kind and encouraging feedback. I appreciate it.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
ledebutant said 3823 days ago (May 3rd, 2007)
Definitely Good
I'll chime in and say that I really like your voice, too. The overall tone and sound is very pleasant and, once you have that, the rest is down to practice.
For a long time I didn't rehearse, but recently I've started doing hour-long recording sessions for about five or six days before the time I start to actually record the song and it has made a really big difference.

Are you comping your vocals, doing multiple takes in the same session and then splicing together the best phrase out of each take into a new track? That's also really key. It sounds to me as though you may have, since the actual vocal is pretty solid. I live for comping, personally. ;-p

Where I'd say you have room to grow as a singer is just to be able to sing a little more expressively and confidently. I agree with racerat that the tempo of the song is making that harder on you and I think that if you rehearsed the song, you'd possibly find yourself more comfortable going out on a limb. I agree with the people who've said that they'd like to hear you break out a bit, vocally in the song, and that's the kind of thing that just comes with practice and feeling more relaxed.

Overall, the song is really good and I think you're definitely on the right track with everything you're doing.
8piscean8 said 3823 days ago (May 3rd, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Lisa,

Thanks for taking the time to stop by and comment. I really appreciate your feedback. On this song I did comp the vocals. I'm not that good at editing in LE7 but I know practice makes perfect. I have also been practising along recently with a vocal warmup CD that's pretty good. I just need to remind myself that my voice is an instrument also. If I want my voice (instrument) to sound better, I need to practice with it like I do my guitar and drums. In general I am a somewhat introverted person so my vocal confidence could definitely use some work. Thanks for your tips!



---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
said 3821 days ago (May 4th, 2007)
Hey man...
News flash: there's nothing wrong with your voice! Just practice. Soon enough other folks will be asking you to sing on there recordings!

This is a fine tune. Interesting lyrics. I love the tone on your lead guitar throughout. Very psychedelic (in the classic sense). Very impressive first outing on Logic. I love the way this is mixed. My only nit is the ending...or rather, the lack of one. The song stops but doesn't end. Apart from that this is fabulous to my ears!

Be well!
8piscean8 said 3821 days ago (May 4th, 2007)
Hello there
Hi Amagi,

Thanks for listening and commenting. I also appreciate your news flash. I have enough stress about performing on my own songs, let alone anyone elses.
I agree with you completely that the end needs to be a little more refined.
Thanks again for the feedback!

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
drakonis said 3810 days ago (May 15th, 2007)
good bits
I like the way the intro slowly builds, although you probably don't need to suddenly bump up the volume just before the other instruments come in, that sounded artificial. I really liked the growly distorted bass guitar.. it sounds really rich, without being jarring. Your singing is actually not as bad as you make it out to be... I think the "sound" of your voice is quite good, and you articulate nicely, so the words sound clear without sounding stilted. Just work on conveying emotion more. The mixing seemed pretty darned good, everything sounded clear. I'd possibly suggest a teeny bit of room reverb on the vox, so they melt into the mix a little more, but maybe not... in some ways your voice has an up-front quality that I like as-is. The performance of drums and guitars had very minor timing issues, but in some ways, that also made this feel quite real/live, and not governed by a plastic metronome. The ending got chopped off on the recording, I definitely wanted that last chord held a ways. I hope these are helpful comments, just my opinion of course!
ttfn,
Drakonis
Check out my latest song called Miwok
8piscean8 said 3810 days ago (May 16th, 2007)
Thanks
Hello Drakonis and thanks for stopping by.

In my future productions I will be taking everyones comments to heart. I agree completely with your comments about the timing issues and the end being cut off. Playing with a metronome is a lot harder than I imagined it would be. You would think that since I performed the different parts, my timing would be impeccable with each other, I was wrong.

There was some reverb on the vocals but not enough to be noticeable. I'll try adding a little more next time. Thanks again for leaving constructive feedback. That's what helps us grow as musicians.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
Doadars Uncle said 3810 days ago (May 15th, 2007)
Hey Adam
I was settling in on your intro then you slammed into the theme (nice). Nice guitar! Don't stress about vocals. It's the feel that always makes the difference. Your expression works very well.

Renaissance man! You do it all here, very impressive. More than I can do, for sure.
Check out my latest song called Don't Leave (remix)
8piscean8 said 3810 days ago (May 16th, 2007)
Ren man, hah
Hi Doug and thanks for commenting and listening.

Sometimes it sucks to be a renaissance man. I've wondered quite often if I should just concentrate more on one instrument. Thanks for the wonderful comment because I think you are a great artist.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
dajama said 3809 days ago (May 16th, 2007)
Impressed
by this. Some great guitar work on here. Love the tone of the guitar in the intro. Like the way you build into the first verse. Your voice has a good feel. I know exactly what you mean about lacking confidence in your vocal. I'm in the same boat! In fact, i think your vocal sounds pretty damn good here. I would agree with the comment someone made below about avoiding tentativeness. Go for it. What's the worst that can happen? What's that old line about dancing like nobody can see you and singing like nobody's listening...? This is a good song, and the recording is good. Your musicianship is excellent! I can't wait to see what you come out with next. Glad I stopped by! Nice work. Peace.
Check out my latest song called Across the Wire (MJRF)
8piscean8 said 3809 days ago (May 16th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi David,

Thanks for stopping by and the comments, they are much appreciated.

Yeah, the next time I record vocals I'm going to try and put some more emotion into them. It's only me singing in my spare bedroom so you're right, what's the worst that could happen? Who cares if my dog runs out of the room because I was way out of tune?

I've been pretty busy lately but I do have another song in the works. It's about procrastination. It's a bit more up-tempo.

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
said 3706 days ago (August 27th, 2007)
hmmmmmm
alot of comments about your voice... i liked your voice. it was fitting with the song.. i do not know a thing about drum recording or mixing, but i can tell you, that your overall mix is good.. everything gels together, and nothing is blaring out at you with the headphones on...
your voice is a tool, used to convey the story rather than play it in notes like the guitar.. i try to use different tones when i sing to create different moods within the song content. some tunes i will sound harsh, almost like i am straining my voice. others, almost whispery.. every note you sing should mean something. i have gotten comments on other sites that i sound great, and still others where they say i should take vocal lessons.... it is in the way you project your feelings that matters.. this is a good song. it has all the right elements... i agree with racerat it should be a tad more uptempo, perhaps not all the way through, but in places, or even as and ending speedup to convey more urgency....your lyrics are deep and thoughtful. telling a story from the first person has been done a million times, but i am always pleased at the many ways it can be done..
good job, brother, and make more music so i can visit your site alot...
Allen
8piscean8 said 3705 days ago (August 29th, 2007)
Thanks
Hi Allen,


Thanks for stopping by and commenting! I haven't had any comments on this song for a while now so this was a pleasant surprise!


I've been busy lately working on a music site that will compliment MacJams so I haven't been playing at all for about the past three months.


I feel the most insecure about my voice but understand when you say how every note you sing should mean something. The vocie is a powerful instrument and I respect that in order to get it to sound good, you must practice with it just like any other instrument.


Once again, thanks for the feedback! I'll have to check out your work!

---
Check out my new song Together and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
smokey bacon jnr said 3704 days ago (August 29th, 2007)
great voice
I shouldn't worry about your voice, you have a great rock tone although like a previous poster said, a bit more drama in there wouldn't hurt. I kept waiting for a real rock out moment towards the end after all those muted notes, but damn it never came!! I like the synth sounds you get too, they fit well in the background and fill out the sound. What about using an "organ" setting - it's a classic rock fill sound. Nice work, I'll check out some of your other stuff.
Check out my latest song called April
8piscean8 said 3703 days ago (August 30th, 2007)
First to comment.
Hello Mr. JR.,

Thanks for the comments. You were the first person to mention those synth sounds so thanks! I'll have to play around with the "rock organ" setting and see what sort of magic can happen. I mixed the synth sounds sort of back in the mix so they are kind of hard to hear. Listening on headphones though they sound pretty good. Sorry to leave you hanging for more, I am still working on my compositions (as we all are) and sort of had writers block as to what else this song needed (if anything). I am trying to get away from the verse - chorus - verse - chorus - bridge - chorus formula. It is hard to get away from that formula though. Thanks again for the comments!

---
Check out my new song <a style="color: orange" href="http://www.macjams.com/song/30599">Together</a> and comment today!
Check out my latest song called The End
Axgrinder said 3632 days ago (November 10th, 2007)
Your vocals don't suck!
Trust me on that (};-P) You kinda have a greendayishness about you! I think you've done quite well on this. How long have you been at it anyway? Just as Texasfeel previously stated, The more you work on it, the better you shall become! You get out of it what you put into it. Nice tune and a tight mix for your first Logic production. You demonstrate quite a lot of talent.

Ax
Check out my latest song called Dark Circus
8piscean8 said 3578 days ago (January 2nd, 2008)
Thanks
Thank you for listening and commenting! I've had about a seven year hiatus from when I played music in high school so my voice isn't in that great of shape. I understand that my voice is like any other instrument and needs practiced and maintained in order to perform well. Thanks again for commenting!
Check out my latest song called The End
timothy devine said 3624 days ago (November 17th, 2007)
hey man
I love the guitar tone.
The tune is real hip.
What great comments.

Seattles (Best) sound
Check out my latest song called Inside of You
8piscean8 said 3578 days ago (January 2nd, 2008)
Thanks
Thank you for your comment sir. I'm glad you liked the guitar tone. I'm not very happy with it but for a first attempt it's not too horrible. I'm still searching for that elusive tone I hear in my head. Thanks again for the comment and listen!
Check out my latest song called The End
ElPeruano said 3583 days ago (December 28th, 2007)
Awesome
I see that you've gotten so many useful commentsm so Ill keep it short. Great song. Great 90's feel (which i really dig). Can't wait to hear your next!
Check out my latest song called you must be crazy
8piscean8 said 3578 days ago (January 2nd, 2008)
Thank
Thank you for the comment and listen. One of my new year resolutions is to make and record more music. So I'll keep you posted when something new comes out. Thanks again!
Check out my latest song called The End
lavalamp said 3571 days ago (January 9th, 2008)
How did I miss you
Strong lyrics man. I like the song. Just put more FX's on the vox and I think you'll be surprised. Work on a better ending, too.
You're a good writer.

LL
Check out my latest song called The Shallow People
8piscean8 said 3570 days ago (January 10th, 2008)
Thanks
Thanks for the compliments on my writing and lyrics. I agree that the song structure isn't quite there yet so I will be revisiting this one in the future. Thanks for stopping by.
Check out my latest song called The End
J.A.Stewart said 3556 days ago (January 24th, 2008)
Nothing New to Report
I have to agree with chikoppi, a terrific recording capture of all the instruments... and with Peter's suggestions.

Overall, this tune DOES have a lot of potential and I believe the more you attempt, the more you will learn about refining your work.

Regarding your vocals, I suspect from what I hear that proper breath control is the main issue. This is largely a matter of exercise and repetition. Look online for fundamental information about singing and you may learn enough to get you started. ;)

--- Joe
Check out my latest song called Crankenhurst Challenge - Verse 1-7 (Inst. Break)
8piscean8 said 3556 days ago (January 24th, 2008)
Thanks
Thanks for the comment. I think you hit the nail on the head with "proper breath control". I will be working on that in the near future. Thanks for stopping by!
Check out my latest song called The End
Elevator_Funk said 3555 days ago (January 25th, 2008)
Cool
I'm new to MJ forums, but i dig your style. People are right about your voice, some people have it and some dont. You have it and you should definately develop it. It's got some kind of character that makes you want to listen. Have you tried doubleing your guitar parts to make them sound more full? That's a suggestion that I just got for my tunes and It made my music way better already.
P.S. I actually like the song too...
Check out my latest song called Dumb Funky
8piscean8 said 3554 days ago (January 26th, 2008)
Thanks for listening!
I have tried doubling my guitar parts but I didn't do it in this song. Another trick is to make a copy of your guitar track and then delay the new copied track by a very small amount. That trick sort of makes it seem like a double tracked guitar but with a sort of different feel. Thanks for your comments!
Check out my latest song called The End
saymme said 3516 days ago (March 4th, 2008)
Great to hear You again !
Lost all my dl, favs, (&fansLmao) everything! Happy to hear this once again, I remeber those LYRICS ! So cool I just L O V E* M ! ! ! ! Impressed by You -Your recordings ! Its swell, & Your vocals don't suck but they could/CAN get better ! 8 ) Hope You get some collabs, be sure to tell us of it, I hate it when People don't put the collabs they've been in on thier pages! GREAT TO HEAR YOU ! I sound like a crow, a 'rusty' one -been smokin tooo much in my life& even before that I never had a singing voice. Not everyone does :( : ( meaning not everyone having a 'TYPICAL *GOOD* voice'. But I really think all People have SOMETHING with their voices which is meant to be-Some are meant to RAP(LOVE IT)Take a look at Musicprograms from different countries in the world....its like.... W O W W O W W O W What they do with their voices! Last nite I saw -missed the first part 8 ( : / Music from MALI Africa...It's so 'educating'(if U don't like that word pick another lol) to see as People in the world&history always made Music in some way, in many cultures it was a way to communicate take a look at the Scandinavian SAMER*(our 'Indians') They have 'Yojks' & 'Kuling' a way to communicate across the huge distances in the fjeld/mountains where they had/have their Reindeer . Its amazing..
Thats why I dont like tvshows like MTV ,'American Idol' & similair s-t(excuse) It kinda brainwashes Young People to think They have to be in a certain way to be accepted , to 'make it'!(!) I just wish MORE Young People would see through this as its ALL ABOUT MONEY & POWER IN THE WORLD .

So KEEP ON MAKIN MUSIC & SINGIN' YOUR BUTT OFF : )
Tx for this & goodluck !
Helena
saymme said 3516 days ago (March 4th, 2008)
( 8 )
Forgot to tell You what I thought more - The Music is SERIOUS.. : ) You really got something in it seems You've come a longer way playing than singing, perhaps You're just more used to playin... I beleive You have alot which is to be discovered & I mean alot-I wouldn't mind hearing this in a faster version as well : ) but perhaps its the tempo that makes it special. The beginningmusic is- VERY good....it kinda struck me/stabbed me right in!!!! You got contrasts in this song which is very interesting ! I gotta read the comments, thats a good way to learn.. 8 )
TX again DL FAVED
8piscean8 said 3515 days ago (March 5th, 2008)
Thank You!
Hello Helena,

Thank you for listening again and all the fantastic comments and thoughts! It is so very true how different voices fit different situations and genres. I'm still trying to find my own place. I'll have a new song posted within the next couple of weeks so I'll keep you posted when I do. Thanks again for all the encouraging words.

-Adam
Check out my latest song called The End
saymme said 3515 days ago (March 5th, 2008)
: )
Looking fwd to it !
Skean said 3493 days ago (March 27th, 2008)
Cool
This is very cool in many ways... Nice mixing as well.. Kinda like this a lot... Thanks for sharing.

Take care
--
Kenta
Check out my latest song called Deep through the forest / W-particledots
8piscean8 said 3492 days ago (March 28th, 2008)
Glad
Hi Kenta,

I'm glad you liked this one also. I think my newest song "Change", which you have already commented on, is a better representation of my music making abilities. Thanks for stopping in!
Check out my latest song called The End
ageofthedeathtree said 3459 days ago (April 30th, 2008)
another...
really cool tune! i'm loving your style man. great stuff, and loads of talent! i'll be watching for newer stuff from you, definitely!

age
-sons of hypnos
Check out my latest song called Further Incapabilities
said 3439 days ago (May 20th, 2008)
Very Good!
This is a very nice song my friend, I was wishing to hear the intro a little shorter but it was very nice. Great vocals you have here... COOL PIECE!

Take Care
- Yeman A. Al-Rawi
psexnyc said 3382 days ago (July 16th, 2008)
Can't Add Much To This Review..
...of this song that everyone above has not already said. I agree with most. But Bro...if you think your voice is bad, you should check out some of my tunes posted here...especially the first few ones I posted. I have been struggling with the sound of my voice since I first developed the cajones to put up a song for public listening. I'm still not crazy about it. Your voice on the other hand is working this song like a mailman on a snowy day...don't stop just keep delivering!!
Check out my latest song called Child In The City
8piscean8 said 3382 days ago (July 17th, 2008)
Love It
Love what you said, "working this song like a mailman on a snowy day." Thanks for listening and the great comment! I think I'll always feel insecure about my voice but practicing does seem to help!
Check out my latest song called The End
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Name: Piscean Dream Band - Adam McClure
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I make music to please my soul. I've always enjoyed music and creating music is a perfect hobby. I make music for fun, not profit. Drop me a line if you want to collaborate. -Adam Free iTunes podcast of Piscean Dream Band here! ... [see more]

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